Here is the magga:-
Immediately I look at this I start asking right insight and right knowledge – later.
Magga has never been high profile in my Path but it is stressed by Tan Ajaan and worth considering for that alone. I must look up different translations to help with understanding.
I am going to begin with right determination because I have been accused of being stubborn. The issue is health and a system friend listens a little when I discuss health issues but doesn’t understand that unless you treat the health system with discernment it will make you ill.
In this case she is partly correct. I broke my wrist although at the time I thought it was a sprain. I put it in a sling for a few days, and then rested it for a month. I did not however know the natural resting position of the wrist. I rested my wrist with palms flat instead of resting it on the side of the hand and the wrist has set in the wrong position. Throughout the month of resting doubts came up but I said let Nature heal it. This was a mistake because I didn’t know the natural position of the wrist, even if I did resting it on the side was not an option as it would have given me pain …. more pain. After a month I went to the physiologist who said he could treat it. He has helped but it is taking a long time – 90% after 18 months – age is a factor.
People around me were saying go to the hospital but these are people who blindly go to the hospital. They are conditioned to go to the hospital, in this case they might have been right – I still have doubts. What would have been better is to have had the bone set in the right position. The issues that keep crossing my mind about this are whether my physiologist will be able to give me full movement – answer no, he has already admitted that some movement has gone. And if I had gone to have the bone set would I have got full movement? System supporters say yes but I just don’t know and I don’t believe them.
This system friend told me I had insurance – I had taken out motor-bike accident insurance and this accident, falling in the garden, was covered – covered as much as any insurance ever covers you. I asked the physiologist whether it would be paid, and he said that the insurance companies don’t accept him. Insurance is an awful thing. Basically there are benefits to insurance if they pay out, but the insurance companies require such conformity to pay out, that conformity did not include my physiologist. My insurance agent is a nice lady at the bank – a key figure in this, and she told me that I had to see a consultant at one of the local hospitals. As the insurance was paying I went to the expensive one, and it was clear that insurance practices and this hospital were a revolving door. I saw the consultant had an x-ray and so after maybe 8 weeks I learnt that the wrist had been fractured.
He offered to reset the bone but said there was only 80% chance of success. I wasn’t interested in what he said because I was only after an insurance paper so I could reclaim money spent at the physiologist. After a discussion in which I rejected the resetting he gave me a follow-up appointment and sent me to physio. The lady was pleasant enough but I had no experience of how good she was. She did say one thing, she felt the diagnosis of resetting the bone was not good and that physio was the best way forward; you might say she would say that. I listened to what she said and was charged 1000 – twice as much as the physiologist. I ignored the follow-up appointment, maybe I should have been polite and informed them I wouldn’t be going. This is also a key point in the story.
I went back to being treated by the physiologist. I submitted 9 receipts for the insurance. Later I went back to the bank lady, and it appeared they were going to refuse payment but the bank lady rattled on at her and the money was paid into my account. Once they had accepted that they would pay I submitted the next 8 receipts. I went to see the bank lady, and she told me I had to see the doctor again as there is a notional “running-out” period of the doctor’s original report. When I went to the hospital I met all kinds of obstacles. Because I had not attended the follow-up I had effectively ended “something”. The words used were accident and diagnosis. I had accident insurance, and the company would pay out for the accident. By not attending the follow-up the doctor had terminated the notion of accident treatment. If I were to have seen the consultant it would have been considered a diagnosis and I would have to pay for that myself. It was not clear to me whether a consultation about diagnosis would have led to a report that would have allowed me to claim for the subsequent treatments with the physiologist. This use of terminology just sounded like bullshit to me, and the bullshit was covering the fact that the hospital were not going to help me with the insurance because they were not getting paid. This was a monopolistic practise. The revolving door of hospital and insurance only worked if you went to the hospital for treatment. In economic terms this makes absolutely no sense for the insurance company as the hospital overcharged, but this is the way the system is.
At the refusal of the hospital to help me I went back to my favourite bank lady, and again she was very helpful. I explained what had happened at the hospital, and she started off on the phone again. She did a lot of work for me, and eventually a new medical report arrived from the hospital – she had sent someone to get it. Amazing!!
As the treatment is ongoing I asked he what to do next time. She had pulled out all the stops she didn’t want me to do a next time. So end of insurance money.
I will continue the treatment with the physiologist paying out of my own pocket. I have found a gem in the bank lady I hope there are not complications, and I won’t step back into that hospital again. All my life I worked as a teacher continually compromising the value of education with the profit motives of the school. You fight the money to get good education. I saw no evidence that the doctor or the administrative minions were doing anything other than being ruled by the dollar.
There is a local “cheap” hospital so maybe I will continue the insurance as it helps the bank gem!!
So to determination. I was accused by this system friend of being stubborn for not going to this hospital first of all. I didn’t know about the insurance so there would have been huge bills that might or might not have been paid. What is the quality of the treatment? I visited a friend in this hospital, and apart from a private room and minions running around nothing seemed to be offered. My own experience has confirmed that.
Determination is so very important. To follow the Path requires perpetual questioning, primarily of the conforming system but also of one’s reactions to it. The friend focussed on one aspect of apparent stubbornness – not attending the hospital in the first place. For her the conforming control is not as significant as it is to me but she eats quite badly, is underweight rather than overweight, and cancer has been an issue in her past. She was part of a unity of voices that said get to the hospital, some more vociferous than others especially those of the women – a strong controlling factor, a strong aspect of conformity.
There are other factors connected to my initial non-attendance of the hospital. I didn’t want to be sat in pain in casualty. I live out in the country so I would have needed to call someone out – taxis are not an option. Friends would have done it. Because I thought it was a bad sprain that was sufficent for me not to call them out – because I didn’t trust them anyway. Perhaps I need to find someone I can trust? A friend took me shopping once a week – helped me survive, once a week was a lot over 8 weeks – increasing to twice a week after 4 weeks. I didn’t want to ask him to take me to the hospital and sort out the insurance as well. The car! I was riding a motorbike. Before going to the physiologist after 4 weeks I tried riding. Got on, drove slowly, toppled to the right (problem with left wrist). For 2/3 weeks I tried to resolve the bike, but have developed a fear of riding and bought a car early – planned to buy at 70!! having the car gave me the freedom to go to the doctor and go to the bank for insurance. Once independent I could resolve all my stuff – an important factor.
Right determination is basically concerned with the Path, perhaps a useful word here is compromise. Fundamentally you do not compromise, you only follow your Path; to me this is what Nature is about. Determination to follow the Path. Conformity is a very dangerous adversity and requires determination not to conform. But at the same time there needs to discernment so that the anti-conformist does not throw the baby out with the bath water. This is a signficant problem with health. Our health industry has been so corrupted by the 1% that in certain areas following the advice of system healers can lead to worse illness. Specifically with cancer the helpless hand-gesturing of the chemo sycophancy is appalling, ingesting poison based on bogus suppositions, and using the position of healer to promote such. With regards to trauma I think the healers help but again the healing practice of the people is dominated by the profit motive – this time the insurance industry. You have to be determined to work out which aspects of the system healing are worthwhile and which are not. If you know a healer who does not compromise with the financial domination then see them, I don’t know them so in conclusion if the same thing happened again I would do the same thing.