I have just moved to a new house. It is a richer house than I want, but I don’t refuse it on those grounds – my rent is not excessive. Sometimes you read of writers living in remote areas able to focus on their craft – even if they don’t. It is that sort of place. I sit outside and there is the dirt road but I cannot see a brick.
As a consequence of this remoteness I was forced into a rethink. It has taken three weeks to get the internet. It was a condition of my moving, but apart from agreeing to the condition the landlady has done nothing. But with effort I got it in. But meanwhile I was thinking about the internet, my websites my blogs. I doubt whether I will ever contribute to the world significantly in the areas that most matter to me. Throughout my adult life – sporadically – I have written scifi, my website has books:-
Since retiring my spiritual work has led me to write the Treatise on Zandtao. This book is mostly finished containing what I want to say about where I am at.
When I retired from teaching I wrote Matriellez about the failures of education as an attempt to highlight what is needed in education if people can ever wrestle control away from the corporations.
It is these writings that are the legacy of my life, they are the parts of the tradition that I have maintained and become aware of during my life. It is these that matter now.
But what do I do mostly? Write blogs. Therapeutic but meaningful? Our world is sound byte-oriented, so if your blog is short enough and hard-hitting enough people will read it, but the truth is much deeper and it takes time to contemplate – hopefully better, meditate. If you put meditational experience in blogs then that takes too much time for the majority to internalise. Their minds race, run from one thought to another often dragging their bodies with them. A tradition requires contemplation; and whilst there is much better available, contemplating what I have written will take many people forward in terms of understanding.
Whilst I have recently started part-time teaching again, this is not that meaningful. I am doing a bit but what I am really offering in the latter years of my life is not teaching children – a valid activity – but my limited understanding through my writing.
Things have gone wrong, I suppose – I don’t know, maybe Karma does. I am a teacher but I don’t teach what matters. I am able to write but I am not a creative writer even though I have written “creative scifi” books. My writing is my expression of my understanding even in the scifi books, my expression in writing is my expression of what I have learnt, but really at this stage of my life, especially as I am a teacher by profession, I should be passing that understanding on educationally. That’s where it is wrong because I am not.
As I am not able to pass it on through teaching I need to perfect what I can and will be spending more time on my website. I meditate, an insight comes, and I rush to blog. I might still blog but the purpose will be adding flesh to the bones of the insight with a view to increasing the little understanding I hope my website offers.
There is a tradition in Thailand – the reusii – hermit. I met one, an American guy. He was being trained up to be a source of the tradition of healing. I am now working to the tradition of Zandtao, I hope it is worth it for someone. Living remotely is not always easy with amenities – especially the water, hopefully my remote issues are worth it for someone. Whatever I will enjoy being up here!
Update 22/9/13:- This was a discussion of my writing but I decided to collate my blogs better as well. To do this I am using categories and tags much better, and have brought in the earlier blogs into this process. On each of the blogs the about page describes my writing. For this blog read this